Just Say “NO” to Men In Black 3

Three strikes and you are out!  Men in Black 1 was leading edge, alien fun from someone who lives in the Cosmic Cow Pie of life.  Men in Black 2 left a lot to be desired toward filling the expectations of a sequel to the first block buster of the Men In Black trilogy.  The third strike is way out and a movie you should not spend money to go and see.

Agent K (Tommy Lee Jones) and Agent J (Will Smith) are usually great in any film but the temptation to go back to the well one more time caught them in this ridiculous travel back in time, alien disaster.  Rotten Tomatoes review says that Josh Brolin saves the day as a young Tommy Lee Jones but have to strongly disagree with that ideas as the entire movie was out in the cosmos and certainly not my type of entertainment.  Different strokes as they say and usually I just pass on writing a negative review but in this case since the first movie was so good my goal is to save you the pain of hoping the series would get better, it doesn't.

Understanding how to get a refund for a bad film is a technique learned through experience.  After sitting through a painful movie I once described to a manager how bad it was and he indicated that if  a movie goer really doesn't like a film in the first 30 to 45 minutes you can come up to the desk and request a credit to see another movie.   Running out the door with my popcorn was a visual I had after the first five minutes of watching Men In Black 3. The slap stick alien message was not computing in this vintage mind trying to reach for something that could be deeper inside the middle school boy theme which was not humorous or entertaining.  Disgusting is the adjective I am reaching for as the two foot long toung of an alien called Boris played by Jemaine Clement) enters the mouth of his girlfriend Lily Poison (Nicole Scherzinger) dancing with the stars professional as they create a diversion to break out of space jail. 

There were actually several messages and funny lines however, I question how the sixth and seventh graders going to see this film will understand the message being shared.

Will Smith, Agent J describes being "fish slapped" by a huge fish. That was funny!

In the trailer Will Smith is "neurolizing" or taking memories away from a group of people in China town after telling them that the tiny fish they got at the school carnival they threw away in the toilet is now out of control.  Now the new phase that can be coined  "I am going to fish slap you."    Funniest part of the movie so if you find this is a reach to laugh, again don't waste your money. 

Taking notes and assessing some helpful thoughts from any movie is how we connect the dots in the Cosmic Cow Pie for movie goers.  There were a few messages that were profound and reading them here will be enough unless you just want to look for something entertaining or a deeper message. 

Lines that made sense in a movie that makes no sense.

  • The most destructive force in the universe is regret. 
  • The bitterest truth is better than the sweetest lies.
  • To stay happy I don't ask questions I don't want to know the answers to
  • There are things out there you do not need to know.

Four memorable quotes is what Men In Black 3 had to offer.  The meaning behind those quotes are actually very powerful the presentation of the messages was missing a pay grade or two .  Don't ask questions you don't want the answer to really does make sense and is a theme that was brought out in the film several times uncovering the secrets of the past which ties back to the truth is better than lies.  No regrets if you miss this movie! 

Just say  "NO" to Men In Black 3.

 

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